17 Essential Thanksgiving Dad Jokes

thanksgiving dad jokes
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This Thanksgiving, as you and your fam stuff yourselves with a week’s worth of food, it’s the perfect time to break out some groan-worthy Thanksgiving Dad jokes. After all, everybody will be too stuffed to run away…kind of like the Thanksgiving turkey!

Why did the turkey decide to play the drums?

Because he already had drumsticks!

What did the turkey do to get kicked out of the sports stadium?

He tryptophan!

What do Pilgrims call their friends?

Pal-grims!

What do you call a turkey the day after Thanksgiving?

Lucky!

And what happens to the unlucky turkeys?

They become poultrygeists!

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
Pilgrims!

If adult turkeys are called gobblers, what do you call a baby turkey?

A goblet!

What kind of music to Pilgrims listen to?

Plymouth Rock!

How does a nerd make a pumpkin pie?
Simply divide the pumpkin’s circumference by its diameter.

Why is cranberry sauce all red?

Because it saw the turkey dressing!

What song should you add to your playlist while cooking the Thanksgiving turkey?

“All About That Baste”

Why did the Pilgrim’s pants fall down?

Because he wore all his buckles on his hat and shoes.

How do turkeys search for information online?

Google, Google, Google!

Why did the farmer separate the chickens and the turkeys?

He suspected fowl play…

What comes at the end of Thanksgiving?

Traditionally, the letter G.

 

You gotta have at least one knock-knock joke!

Knock-Knock!

Who’s there?

Norma Lee.

Norma Lee who?

Norma Lee I don’t eat this much, I swear!

 

And finally…

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but she couldn’t find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?”

“No, ma’am. They’re dead.”